heading back 2 work.
part one.the balancing act.
for those out there like me before kids work has and been my life for so long.
It was our choice for me to work as like everyone we have a mortgage and it would have been hard to bring someone in for a small period of time to cover my job.
I've been working in the industry for 15 years and I have my dream job. I love my job. I love the people I work with. I have never worked for a company that I believe in more. I love the achievements you get and the job satisfaction. my job is a big part of who I am.
then when you become a mum you have something that needs just YOU to survive. 24-7.
it becomes a juggling act and does take some time to adjust.
When duke was 5 weeks I took him into work for a week. The plan was I work some days from home and come into the office when I need too. I am so lucky to work for a company who welcomed me with duke in tow back to work and very fortunate to have crew who were happy to have duke in the meetings as we all worked. I'll take the opportunity to thank HR and my manager S.O , S.R and A.M for their support. And the coffee truck. large skinny cap 3 sugars please.
so I fed him, changed nappies and he slept all in the meeting room and was even rocked in his pram by the crew even some of guys. Brilliant.
but when it comes to getting your work done and you have a dealine you start to get a little frustrated as he would wake and cry just when you had too finish what you were doing your thinking "come on just another 5 mins and I 'll have it all finished" but then your thoughts immediately turn into "oh sh*t your crying I need to pick you up for a cuddle and see what's wrong".
All of a sudden you are in shock that you realise that you thought "work" first then "baby."
Hang on where's my motherly instinct??!! How could I have done that!
Guilt sets in why the hell did I think work first??!! but this is how its been for so long in your life that it's only natural for you too juggle a new priority.
It does change, I promise. The priority shifts and before long duke is now my first thought. but it didn't come straight away. how can it when you have had your brain trained this way for so long?!
The day this happened I had been at work for 2 hours and my dad rang and he was upset and duke was crying in the background. my dad NEVER gets upset so I knew something was wrong all I could make out was "Dukes not taking his bottle come home". I got off the phone, grabbed my keys and ran out of work and was at mum and dads within 2 minutes. Poor dad was sweating as Duke doesn't cry often so when he does its quite scary. As soon as I he saw me he started smiling. Little bugger. He just wasn't hungry and made sure PaPa knew about it.
I couldn't go back to work with out the help of my husband and my parents especially my dad who is a retired 68 yr old and now a part time nanny. he is amazing- walking the streets of churchlands with the bugaboo and changing nappies. talk about a new age grandparent. he loves it and misses the days Im not at work. so great for duke to have this special bond with his PaPas and Memes.
Last week I was at work for 5 days, up at 6.30, feed at 7 dropped off Duke at mum and dads at work by 8, run to mum and dads for a breastfeed at 2 (he was bottle fed @ 11)back to work then my husband picked him up at 4 then I'm home at 6 for feed, bath and bed then up at 12 and 3 for feeds then the new day starts again.
I'm no super mum (but been called a crazy) by any means as there are mums out there that do this with 3++ kids plus clean the house, you just do what you have too but I won't lie I did get the guilt's especially when my dad said duke can hold his own bottle now. a small achievement and where was I??!
I also felt a bit guilty as I tried to breastfeed 3 times in the morning, the arvo and at night it was just a got bit too hard to time when duke was hungry in the arvo. he then started to want the bottle instead. I want ed to at least get too breastfeed until 6 months (what the book said) but now it had already been decided- bottle it is and Duke made that decision for me. all sweet. happy days.
My beautiful friend E who is also a working mum sent me these words on an email that week and it made me feel so much better-
"If you can make your little man smile everyday you are doing a fab job. The best lesson I believe as a mother to pass to your children is to be happy and love life. Now there is no question that you are giving that to Duke. He will always be your number one priority and the best part about that is that he knows that...."
now duke's on the bottle full time it has made the decision that over the next few months I can start two full days in the office and the 2 days are the same so theres a routine/continuity for everyone (around my dads fishing days)!!
PS- This post is just me sharing what I'm going through and no means saying that going back to work is right or wrong, you just have to do what's right for you and your famliy. But if you have to, you need to know that it really is managable and you can do it with a good support system and some organisation and is trually rewarding being able to hold onto a bit of you in such a crazy time. and the day's you are at home you appreciate, and yes I might try and do some of that cleaning....NOT!!
part one.the balancing act.
for those out there like me before kids work has and been my life for so long.
It was our choice for me to work as like everyone we have a mortgage and it would have been hard to bring someone in for a small period of time to cover my job.
I've been working in the industry for 15 years and I have my dream job. I love my job. I love the people I work with. I have never worked for a company that I believe in more. I love the achievements you get and the job satisfaction. my job is a big part of who I am.
then when you become a mum you have something that needs just YOU to survive. 24-7.
it becomes a juggling act and does take some time to adjust.
When duke was 5 weeks I took him into work for a week. The plan was I work some days from home and come into the office when I need too. I am so lucky to work for a company who welcomed me with duke in tow back to work and very fortunate to have crew who were happy to have duke in the meetings as we all worked. I'll take the opportunity to thank HR and my manager S.O , S.R and A.M for their support. And the coffee truck. large skinny cap 3 sugars please.
so I fed him, changed nappies and he slept all in the meeting room and was even rocked in his pram by the crew even some of guys. Brilliant.
but when it comes to getting your work done and you have a dealine you start to get a little frustrated as he would wake and cry just when you had too finish what you were doing your thinking "come on just another 5 mins and I 'll have it all finished" but then your thoughts immediately turn into "oh sh*t your crying I need to pick you up for a cuddle and see what's wrong".
All of a sudden you are in shock that you realise that you thought "work" first then "baby."
Hang on where's my motherly instinct??!! How could I have done that!
Guilt sets in why the hell did I think work first??!! but this is how its been for so long in your life that it's only natural for you too juggle a new priority.
It does change, I promise. The priority shifts and before long duke is now my first thought. but it didn't come straight away. how can it when you have had your brain trained this way for so long?!
The day this happened I had been at work for 2 hours and my dad rang and he was upset and duke was crying in the background. my dad NEVER gets upset so I knew something was wrong all I could make out was "Dukes not taking his bottle come home". I got off the phone, grabbed my keys and ran out of work and was at mum and dads within 2 minutes. Poor dad was sweating as Duke doesn't cry often so when he does its quite scary. As soon as I he saw me he started smiling. Little bugger. He just wasn't hungry and made sure PaPa knew about it.
I couldn't go back to work with out the help of my husband and my parents especially my dad who is a retired 68 yr old and now a part time nanny. he is amazing- walking the streets of churchlands with the bugaboo and changing nappies. talk about a new age grandparent. he loves it and misses the days Im not at work. so great for duke to have this special bond with his PaPas and Memes.
Last week I was at work for 5 days, up at 6.30, feed at 7 dropped off Duke at mum and dads at work by 8, run to mum and dads for a breastfeed at 2 (he was bottle fed @ 11)back to work then my husband picked him up at 4 then I'm home at 6 for feed, bath and bed then up at 12 and 3 for feeds then the new day starts again.
I'm no super mum (but been called a crazy) by any means as there are mums out there that do this with 3++ kids plus clean the house, you just do what you have too but I won't lie I did get the guilt's especially when my dad said duke can hold his own bottle now. a small achievement and where was I??!
I also felt a bit guilty as I tried to breastfeed 3 times in the morning, the arvo and at night it was just a got bit too hard to time when duke was hungry in the arvo. he then started to want the bottle instead. I want ed to at least get too breastfeed until 6 months (what the book said) but now it had already been decided- bottle it is and Duke made that decision for me. all sweet. happy days.
My beautiful friend E who is also a working mum sent me these words on an email that week and it made me feel so much better-
"If you can make your little man smile everyday you are doing a fab job. The best lesson I believe as a mother to pass to your children is to be happy and love life. Now there is no question that you are giving that to Duke. He will always be your number one priority and the best part about that is that he knows that...."
now duke's on the bottle full time it has made the decision that over the next few months I can start two full days in the office and the 2 days are the same so theres a routine/continuity for everyone (around my dads fishing days)!!
PS- This post is just me sharing what I'm going through and no means saying that going back to work is right or wrong, you just have to do what's right for you and your famliy. But if you have to, you need to know that it really is managable and you can do it with a good support system and some organisation and is trually rewarding being able to hold onto a bit of you in such a crazy time. and the day's you are at home you appreciate, and yes I might try and do some of that cleaning....NOT!!
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